Hey, you are looking a little trampy, Barbie.

Barbies were a big hit this Christmas at the Perryman house.  One of the not so pleasant side effects of having a house full of barbies is that you inevitably end up with a house full of naked barbies.  There are times when I walk into Abby's room (aka barbie central) and literally every single barbie is disrobed. 

Why?

Theory one: The clothes are hard to put on.  I have put approximately 100 barbie outfits in the last 3 weeks so I am an expert.  It is difficult to cloth them.  Once the dress is off, it is hard to get back on, without a crow bar and a lot of time.  I am glad I have a college degree so I know the exact angle to bend the barbie arm so the dress will go on.  I know the exact amount of pressure to put on the barbie foot so that the shoe will go on the foot instead of the foot wiggling out again.

Theory two: Art imitates life.  My kids like to be naked.  They would like to be naked all the time if I would let them.  Most days, Harper walks in from school and immediately takes off her shoes, socks and pants.  My friends come over and I am usually trying to make Harper put on a pair of pants seconds before they walk in the front door.  I don't always succeed.  I make Harper wear a shirt and underwear all the time, but she won't if  I don't make her.  Right now, my three big kids are all asleep in just their underwear.  I've given up on trying to make them were pajamas. 

Theory three: The clothes are so trampy, the barbies might as well be naked.  Every single barbie dress is super short.  Every pair of barbie shoes are stilettos.  Come on barbie, where are you going to wear these outfits?  Not to church or the library.  Not to the office or the grocery.  I guess the kids figure that where ever the barbies are going in those clothes, the barbies might as well go naked.

The flu does not count as a Christmas present

This year, my kids decided to get sick for Christmas.  In turn, each kid spiked a fever and was down on the couch for their turn with the flu.  My new snuggie that Harper gave me for my birthday came in handy as the favorite blanket during sick episodes.

Cece did sick the best because her illness came with a side of projectile vomit....be thankful I didn't take a picture because I was holding her each time.  Matt saw it happen and he can describe it if you would like, but please don't ask.
I took all four of my kids to the doctor on the Saturday before Christmas to get them checked out and to see if any meds could help.  I also took them BACK in on Christmas eve to have Cece rechecked.  It is times like this where I can see other parents looking at me and thinking: "why does that crazy woman have a traveling zoo with her at the doctor's office?"  Their thoughts come out in much nicer statements, like "you've got your hands full," or "what beautiful children," but I know.  What else could you say if you saw this all sneezing, feverish and loud in the waiting room sitting next to you?  You are just reaching for the hand sanitizer hoping that we all have the same form of one disease (instead of four different diseases) to spread to you and yours.  Giving is better than receiving at Christmas.

The kids did rally for Christmas.  While we were disappointed that we couldn't carry out our fun tradition of Christmas with Aunt Shandra and Uncle Thomas, we were very excited that Santa made it to our house.  I have lots of great Christmas pictures, but some of my favorites are the ones with "sick eyes."   You can see it in their eyes that they don't feel good, but gosh darn it, Santa came and they are going to have fun!

Christmas 2012

Even with the illnesses that made it into our house, we had a lovely Christmas.  It was CeCe's first Christmas and the big kids had a blast.  They are just the right ages to get it.  They understand the Christmas story and they like spending time together. While I may gripe about the occasional hardships of a large family, days like this make it totally worth it.  Here are a few of the good ones from Christmas.



Everyone made into this picture.  I like to call it "Christmas carnage."



Will riding his new bike in the foyer.

Hello Kitty and a craft?  This is so Abby.

Harper and I played princess legos all around the house.



Baby C and me on Christmas morning.  I am still in my pajamas and my hair is not brushed, but I do have coffee.

 

Here is Cece in her Christmas outfit.  Abby has learned how to read the words on the pants.  Every time I hold Cece up, she comes by and pokes her in the butt so she can show that she is reading the words.

I am Baby C

Life is pretty good. Mom holds me all the time. I make sure it stays that way, because I scream when she puts me down. I don’t care if she puts me down in the bouncy seat or the swing or the car seat, I scream.  I scream the whole time. Then Mom picks me up and I don’t scream. Sometimes Will holds me too. That is tolerable. But I refuse to let Dad hold me. I scream.

All and all, this family thing is cool. There is usually lots of activity and places to go.  I think the other little people might be crazy.  Who am I fooling, I think the big people might be nuts too.  Look what Mom let the little people do the other day.

I have a few new tricks that Mom seems to like.  I make these cute noises that are not even words.  Mom goes nuts and smiles really big.  Then I smile because she smiles.  It is just one big smile party. 

Don't worry, I have other tricks as well.  I can blow spit bubbles. If Mom holds me just right, I can poop all over her and my clothes. Life is pretty good.

My Productive Self and Non-productive Self

My Productive Self (PS) and my non-productive self  (NPS) are at odds most days. Here is what I hear them say to one another:

PS: Hey.

NPS:Hey, good to see you (they are very cordial to one another).

PS: What did you think of dinner last night?

NPS: Some of your best work.  You were really productive.

PS: Aw, thanks.  I worked really hard. 

NPS: Too bad the kids didn't eat one bite.

PS: Typical.

NPS: What? Sorry, I was watching Good Morning America.

PS: So what are your plans today?

NPS: Plans are really more your thing. I was going sit on the couch and hold the baby. Maybe take a shower but I don’t want to set my sights too high. I am okay to go one more day without a shower.

PS: Disapproving look.

NPS: Did you want to do something?

PS: I am glad you asked. I wanted to finish the Christmas cards, clean out Abby’s drawers, go buy stamps, call about repairing the windshields on the cars, scrub the bathroom, do the dishes and review the online customer reviews about pumps. We need to check work email as well, don’t forget. If we still have extra time between baby feedings, let’s run to Martins and get something fun to make for dinner.

NPS: No. Let’s watch the whole HBO series The Girls on demand.

PS: Wait, that seems incredibly….

NPS: Incredibly what?

PS: Lazy.

NPS: I agree to a shower and I will blow dry my hair. Don't we get points for nursing the baby ALL THE TIME and for picking up the big kids off the bus on time?

PS: Lazy.

NPS: Shhh…The Girls is on. Don’t you want to see this?

While I love both my productive self and my non-productive self, the latter has been putting the better agenda forward.  This is what maternity leave is about.  It is a reward, almost a prize for having a baby. Both my productive self and my non-productive self can feel the wonderful maternity leave days slipping away and don’t want to miss their chances for greatness. NPS wins once more today; we count the shower as a great achomplishment.

Lord, please don't let this little girl get hurt again

Abby has inherited my grace and agility.  Abby, I am sorry about that.  We were working on Christmas cards on Saturday morning.  I walked over to get the waffles out of the toaster.  When I was walking back, I watched as Abby simply fell out of the chair she was sitting in.  She just hit the floor.  It was not on purpose.  It surprised her as much as it surprised me.  She came up with a huge scrape on her nose.  It joins the bruise on her forehead she got the night before while wrestling with her brother.  Dang girl, you look like you got beat up. 

This is not Abby's first run in with injuries.  There was the infamous toenail that fell off when she hit it with a door.  Abby handled it with her own style, which eased the pain but did not stop the grossness. When her toe nail fell off, she put it in a sandwich baggy to show everyone.  We all had the same stomach churning reaction.  Then she asked me to paint her toenails, including the skin where the toe nail used to be so it would all "look good."  Yep, that was gross.  To Abby, it was awesome. 

I can't wait she will do with the headwounds.  She did ask me to write a note to her teacher this morning explaining what happened.  I asked her, why don't you just tell the teacher.  Abby let me know it would be better if there was a note.  The least I can do is give her (and her teacher a reason) to give her extra attention.